mostly, i'm a frazzled "trier"

don't you ever just get this sick feeling that you are trying really hard for the wrong things?

like your intentions are possibly good.
routed in wanting to love.
but the effect of this work proves that you may be wasting your time?

so?
do you?
i do.

i get something in my head that i think needs to be done and i just can't let it go....until i make myself.

i do this about talking too much at my kids, always making the bed, thinking i should be making dinner every night,

thinking i need to teach others a lesson, thinking i deserve more than i do, wanting to be good at things that i'm not good at,

taking on more responsibility for others than is mine, thinking i need to be friendlier,

thinking i need to teach my kids to be better behaved.....

I'm sure there's more, but that's what first comes to mind.
and while none of these things are wrong, if put too high on my priority list, they can be very hurtful to my family and even to myself.

it can make me a frazzled "trier" instead of the peaceful, thankful woman i want to be.

i read this post today and it really made me think twice about how i've been parenting.
sometimes forgetting that i need to personalize my approach for each kid.

sometimes getting caught up in managing my very energetic crew and forgetting to be still with them.

trying to keep up with their energy, but not at the cost of running us all ragged.
with this all in mind, i have been trying to say no to more "activities" so that i can really just look at my kids and be still with them.

have a "snack bar", read a story, snuggle til 8:30am, brush hair, spray each other with the hose.
you know, the little stuff.

don't get me wrong, i do love a good list of ideas, but let's not get too caught up in it now people!

tomorrow we have nothing going on.

and that is just what we need, i think.