attention!

when the volume in my life (car, house, surrounding area gets too loud) i have told my kids that i will start to say this word.
attention.
attention.
ATTENTION.
ATTENTION! EXCUSE ME, ATTENTION!!!!
yah, i usually end up yelling it.
my kids are loud...they can't hear me sometimes unless i yell it.
(i'm loud too, i guess they get it from me. gross)
then when they hear me saying it they are supposed to listen to me for directions.
ha ha. supposed to.
just thought i'd share that little tidbit.
it works.
like 50% of the time, i'd say.

so, now that i have yours (attention), i have some thoughts (with random photos interspersed).

ONE
blogsugar.
are you going?
i know there have been some naughty shenanigans about me and whether or not i want a hug.
please people.
do not make that a thing.
please.
i know how to hug.
i am NOT grossed out by hugging.
i NEVER said that.
(i am a little dramatic, at times, though)
i just said that i am not one of those people that are "huggers".
you know who you are.
i like you, too.
hugger or not.
a hugger is someone who hugs everytime they see you.
i do one hug...when i haven't seen you for a while.
then the next day when i see you again, i don't feel the need to do it again.
i hug my children and my husband three hundred and sixty two times a day.
i am not a cold hearted lady.
i am just not super snugly if you are not my children, husband or sister.
got it?
i do not think about it constantly.
and i do not think you are weird, annoying, gross, or loose if you hug more than me.
the end.
no more talk about it.

(and here are some photos of ella and my rough day, the other day....)

TWO
i had mommy time today.
i went to cafe rio and had my ipod on the whole time.
i texted with a friend and ate and listened to music.
and then i saw some police officers eating too.
i was thinking about how i heard my husband talking the other day about a friend of ours who is a police officer too and how when he eats in a restaurant he sits in a certain spot to make sure he can see the whole place and is just generally "on guard" during any meal...even when he's not on duty.
that made me really grateful.
i mean, i sat with my back to the door, listening to blasting music and looking down at my phone the whole time and i was safe.
i was and am safe because of guys like him.

THREE
my friend Joy had her baby and she is the cutest thing i have ever ever seen.
and i haven't even seen her in real life (that is torturing me, by the way).
i want one.
just kidding.
sorta.
don't tell reedo.
or.
maybe i just want a retro camper like hers...that may be more up my ally right now.
reedo knows about that.
thats less work.

FOUR
school got canceled on friday(last) because of the blackouts.
it was the third day of school, so honestly i wasn't too thrilled.
(if it had been in a month from now, i'd have LOVED it and slept in with wild abandon and done super fun spontaneous things)
but it was the day after a pretty sad melt down (by me) and i was just hanging on to my own sanity by a string.
i pulled myself together though and met up with Les and her kids at our new favorite pancake house for a special "school got canceled breaky".
then we had mellow time and karate and even fish and chips at the harbor later...it was a good day.
it helped me get past my bad week.
we sat at the harbor and played the age old game "what boat is your favorite boat" and i remembered my mom taking me to the harbor when i was their age....sigh.
i'd get bubble gum ice cream at the scoop deck too....

but i don't remember trying to put the chewed up bublegum behind my ear (like charlie and the chocolate factory)...that seems more like something my sister Val woulda tried....

well, aunt Val, if that's true and that seems like something that sounds like a good idea to you,

Jake made you proud that night.

i even had to cut it out of his hair...

lovely.

(he doesn't even look sorry)

FIVE
i had a date with ty

all he wanted to do was go to the mall and see where the LEGO store will be.

he knew it wouldn't be open.

he just wanted to see if it was true.

is it really coming?

and then see if there were any clues about when it will open.

he is obsessed.

so we did that and got a cookie and a tea/ sprite.

it was perfect.

then we went to the disney store and he picked out these little guys.

yep.

tigger and pooh.

he is seriously the sweetest little child.

i don't even deserve him.

SIX
i've been having this revelation lately about beauty.
it's everywhere.
and i want to capture it and keep it and hold onto it.
i guess that's why i take pictures of things.
and sometimes the immense volume of beautiful things is overwhelming to me.
beauty is there
when i step into the ocean with my daughter and
when the breeze blows through the trees as i get into the car and
when the light shines through the window onto my little son's freckles and
when my daughter puts on a hideous outfit and comes downstairs as proud as can be saying "daddy, aren't i so pretty!?"
when my husband gives me a tired smile and a sigh when he walks in the door and
when my daughter gets mad and pouts so that everyone will look at her and
when i make something with my sewing machine and
when my son immediately looks at me right when he finds he's earned his orange belt in his karate class and
when i look on pintrest and see something i could do so easily and
when my 8 year old discovers he wants to style his hair, now and

when my 6 year old copies him and
when the setting sun streams into the yard house while we wait for a table and
when my sweet girl wears red boots and.....

sometimes the incredible luxury of all this beauty makes my head spin and i struggle with what to do with it all.
how can i catch it and pin it down (just watched sound of music. obvs.)?
i am in constant battle between trying to capture it (with a photo or a blog post or even just a "i've gotta remember this feeling") and just letting it be...letting the moment come and go and being there living in it and enjoying it and reveling in a gift given to me.
am i the biggest drama queen you've ever even met?
my mom used to tell me that as a girl she would have similar thoughts and said she thought about "putting a frame around this moment".
i want to do that, but the moments sometimes just seem to slip away...

SEVEN
ok ok, the last thing is bad


brace yourself.


do not panic.

this was my car 3 hours after a car wash.
i went to get a little celebratory car wash on the first day of school.
and guess what i forgot?
that kids play in the sandbox at school and then get in the car and take off their shoes
to show how much sand is in them!!!
attention!
attention!!!!!
do not take off your shoes until you get home and are sitting in the grass in the front yard!!!!!!!
(yah, it was too late)
good thing he is the cute one.