apple cider and disappointment

here i am.
sitting in front of the computer with a small icy jar of apple cider.
icy apple juice/cider makes me think of two things.
one: being in the hospital when i delivered my children (i drank that like it was goin' outa style)
two: apple picking
our family is supposed to be doing that this weekend.
i was looking forward to that.
and i am sure i still will be able to do it another weekend.
but i'm feeling kinda baby-ish about it right now.
our plans have been set aside because of a work obligation.
i am very very grateful for reedo's job.
his job means a lot to me.
it provides me with many of the things that i care about most right now.
but i still wish to be apple picking.
i want to take fun pictures like i've done the past few years.
bea took um the first year we went.
remember this year?

i loved that year.
or or or!
remember last year?

ok ok don't be annoyed at my stroll down memory lane.
i'm just feeling sorry for myself.
it doesn't have to make any sense.


whaa whaaa.
i've got a really hard life.
this what last weekend looked like.

yah, sorta ridiculous to be whining.

i'll just sip my cider and shut up, ok?