here i am, givin' what i've got (framing my moments)

if you don't recognize that title reference.....

then you obviously aren't watching as many barbie movies as i am lately.

just be thankful.

but, i am here, giving what i have left and that is just not much right now...

i am running around like a wild woman lately.

we have our house, we're painting our house, we are scheduling deliveries and set ups and tons of details.

and i missed wednesday to do "frame this moment" again.

but i have been doing it.

in fact i have three.

the moments she's learning to read

the moment he decided against the high dive
(i didn't get to capture the moment he DID, but there was that moment too)

these two have too many moments to keep track of.
it's true love, i tell you.

that's what i've got.
and i'm givin' it.
join me, if you can.

frame this moment

this moment.

it's not that flattering.

it's not a great picture.

it was ONE OF THOSE MOMENTS.

you know?

where you just feel like you wanta freak.

I had done everything i could do for my kids that day.

tried to teach them

tried to play with them

tried to do special things

tried to listen

tried to be so so patient

and i had nothing left

and as i sang them to sleep with the last breath in my body (i know, i know, DRAMA)

i heard the first born softly crying and telling me how it was so unfair that he had to go to bed
and that it was "baby bedtime".

baby bedtime apparently was 9:45 that night.

all i heard was "blah blah blah, what you've done for us today was not enough"

i considered screaming.

i considered kicking and punching things.

i considered crying and yelling at him.

instead i walked quietly out in the middle of my nightly lullaby

they complained.

i told them in the VERY quiet super scary voice 

that if they get out of bed one time things would get very very bad for them.

i sat down by myself against the wall and pushed down resentment that i was alone with my kids all week again.

i thought, this moment needs to be framed too.

this is real.

this just shows you that no matter how fun and patient and loving and energetic and interesting you are, it really is never enough.

i can't be everything.

people still have a choice (not naming names)

if they want to feel ungrateful there's not much i can do about it.

and then it hit me.

i do the same exact thing.

great.
i feel like an ass.

so that's my moment.
please tell me yours is better....

waves and the long long escrow

sometimes it's hard being the little brother.

you just want to do stuff that you are a little bit too small for.

but sunday was the day of the little brother here with us reeds.

the tiny guy caught his first wave by himself.

he's surfed with his daddy before, but was just a little too scared to ride waves alone.

but after a rough previous weekend where jake got a new soft top board to ride, ty was motivated to just do it!

he did, and he was so proud of himself.

in other news we did our final walkthrough for our new house on saturday.

we are "supposed" to sign the final papers this week.

but hawaii is not known for super fast movers, people, so i just have to sit back and wait....

it's like slow motion, when all i want is to be in our house 

and all i can do is deal with what i've got.

patience, patience, patience.

i'm sure you know what i mean.