school days....

some things to note on the first day of school:

1.  i had to leave Jake at school without saying goodbye.
it was hard.
his class had started and i had to help Ty get settled, since he is littler.
he has asked me why i did that 45 times already today.
"why did you leave without saying goodbye mom?"
"you said you'd be right back"
rip my heart out, jake.

2. there was a point during the first day of school drop off production, that ella sat down in the middle of the hot, sweaty, stampeding mob of parents.
she was so mad and crying and saying "i'm tired of walking! take me to schooooool!"
and just refused to get up.
as jake and ty walked into the heard.
i think it was 94 degrees at 7:52 am

at least she's cute.

3. ty decided that he wants to go by "tyler" this year.
i think it's because his teacher already labeled everything with that name.

jake's teacher had two name tags premade.
one said "jake r." and one said "jacob" he chose "jake r."
i wonder what ty would've chosen if he'd been given the option.

he doesn't want to tell his teacher that he likes being called "ty".
or does he really like tyler better?
who knows.

4. both my boys had this for their first day of school lunch.

pizza lunchables (mommy style):
an english muffin cut in two.
a plastic covered cup of pizza sauce
shredded mozzarella
5 pepperoni

fruit snacks

z-bar for snack

it was a HIT!

6. i finished drop off at about 9am today and had two hours til pick ups started....not long but still i thought this milestone in my life deserved a quiet moment or two.
so, i went to my favorite spot.
the mission.

you're probably sick of seeing me at the mission.
i take so many pictures there.
but that's where i went today.
it must be documented.
i sat with my chippy polished toes up on a bench.

i watched as the monarch butterflies danced in twos around the purple status
i listened to the gardening ladies as they watered the flowers around the big fountain.
i relaxed to the murmur  of quiet spanish speaking voices in the gift shop

i sipped a icey diet coke and talked on the phone to reedo about the drop offs and how i felt about them.

i sent him this picture.

he said i looked sad.
i told him i sorta am.
he asked why.
i told him i felt bittersweet about no more babies.
he told me we cold make another.
i said, "oh yah"
he said he felt a little sad too, but that ella is still a baby for a few more years.
i said, "oh yah"

so here i am.
i'm still here.
i still have a "just me and ella"day tomorrow.
a long one.
till two.
and my kids are still getting in trouble for kicking each other at 8:52 at night.
nothings changed.
except it has.



  1. Shauna my heartstrings were pulled at reading this post. I have been there and felt/feel this way every time my kiddos go back to school. Loved how your hubs said ya'll could make another one...mine says that to me all the time..oh those men. :) Your right, some things will always be, but others are forever changing.

  2. Being a mom is hard isn't it? This whole loving beyond capacity just to let them go thing. It's rough.

  3. This is my 1st year when I have 3 hours by myself when all 3 kiddos are in school. I love it and hate it at the same time. The no more babies has really kicked in now. : ( Love your pics.

  4. that's how I felt when I sent my babies off to school! but then last year, we decided homeschooling would work for our family and we haven't looked back! YOu could always homeschool!!! although some days, I just want a little peace & quiet and wish they would go BACK to public! haaa~!

  5. oh man. well i don't know. maybe you should have another babers.

  6. you do look sad in that photo. Pretty, but sad.

  7. Man. I really love your blog.
    Love from,